Why are you staring at me?

By Allison Donald
I can’t remember the last time I gave a damn about someone staring at me in public because of my disability.  If someone is staring at me while I am grocery shopping, at the mall, or having lunch with my coworkers it has more to do with them than it does with me. 

I have grown to accept and embrace my uniqueness and you should too.  People with disabilities do not deserved to be stared at while in public simply, because we have body parts that work differently. 

I do realize that not every person with a disability is as comfortable in their skin as I am, which makes it extremely difficult to deal with a stranger staring while you are going about your life.  Some people can’t help themselves. There is always going to be someone who is gawking at you with a confused look on their face wondering what happened to you. Sometimes people have asked me if I were an accident. 

If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me these questions I would be able to pay off my student loan.  I find these questions invade my space. They are rude and presumptuous.  Frankly, if you are not family or a close friend the reason why I am a person with a disability is none of your business.

The rudeness and stares from typical people gets on my nerves. It also makes me and other individuals with a disabilities feel like we are someone who is to be pitied. Or for that matter, people who see me as an inspiration, bothers me even more. 

Are you staring, because you don’t know how you would deal with being a person who is visually impaired or a wheelchair user? Are you staring, because you can’t believe that a person with a disability is living, working, and playing in the community just like other people and you are inspired by my very presence? 

I don’t feel I have to explain myself and other people with a disabilities shouldn’t either. Because you want to stare a hole through us we a too busy living our lives.

Instead of staring, take a minute to come up to me and introduce yourself and I will do the same. After all that is how conversations begin.